Emotional Intelligence & Social Competencies: Part II

Part 2: Rules of Works and Emotional Intelligence Social Competencies: Manager’s Critical Skills

The first part of this article concluded that the manager’s primary challenge is self- management. Self- management resembles an inner conversation which enables the manager to balance the thinking and emotional brain so as to behave in a manner that exuberates self- mastery and optimistic enthusiasm.

The manager’s behaviour and emotions are picked up by the team and his influence is such that it leads the collective emotions of the team. The next step for the manager is then to build his social competencies of social awareness and relationship management. There is no doubt about the fact that a team of motivated and resonant team members can together think of better ideas and make better decisions than any one individual can, irrespective of his experience and IQ . The manager influences the level of espirit de corps and how well the team binds together by effectively using his social competency skills.

The following rules as given in Richard Templar international best seller “The Rules of Work- A definitive code for personal success??? come under the domain of Social Awareness:

  • Look after yourself. This means knowing the ethics and legalities about your industry, know the difference between the truth and the whole truth, understanding others motives and assuming everyone else is playing by different rules.
  • Know the system and milk it. Understanding the organisational politics, informal groups and their influences, knowing the favourites and cultivating them and being on the right side of people who count need to be focussed on. This may be against the value system for some, as it was for me during my years in the corporate world but is essential to know and make use of. These behaviours can be used in consonance with your values of what is right and for the greater good of the organisation and your own growth. Remember nobody ever made a difference by being in the spectator’s gallery, the real chance to make a difference comes only when you are in the game.
  • Blend in. Knowing the corporate culture, understanding social protocols, knowing the rules about authority and office hierarchy will increase social awareness and help you imbibe them to be seen as being in the “A team??? of the organisation.


This social awareness now enables the manger to foster strong and supportive relationships under the domain of Relationship Management. The rules which support this are:

  • Cultivate diplomacy. Asking questions in times of conflict, not taking sides, knowing when to keep your opinion to yourself, knowing how to handle other people’s anger and other negative emotions, being objective about the situation and putting things in perspective are the critical areas of development.
  • Handle the opposition. Identifying the opposition, keeping your ear close the ground ,capitalising on the career enhancing moments and cultivating the friendship and approval of your colleagues makes the manager pre-empt challenges and be pro-active in solving them.

Emotional Intelligence Skills with clearly demonstrated behaviours are skills which mangers “need to have??? against the ones “nice to have???. The good news is that these skills can be learned but takes persistence and commitment. I would suggest that manager’s pick up not more than three rules at a time under any of the domains and work on developing them over a one year period. It has been found that any good manager needs at least one strength area in each of the four EI domains to move from being a manager to an effective manager.

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